Our Story

 weeping may endure for a night

Up until the 32nd week of my pregnancy, I was considered "low-risk." The baby was growing as expected, there had been little in the way of complication and we were heading towards the mid-April due date exactly as we had expected.

Probably our fault for getting too comfortable...

At a regular appointment with my OB in mid-February, my blood pressure measured above normal and I tested positive for protein in my urine. Many of you will know that these are both troubling signs of potential pre-eclampsia.  The condition is now commonly known as "pregnancy-induced hypertension," or PIH.

Just like that, I became a high-risk case, no longer able to work and visited daily by nurses at home to have my blood pressure checked and the baby monitored.  My activities were restricted and eventually, I was prescribed some medication to keep the BP in further check. We were informed that we would eventually see signs that the placenta was no longer providing the needed nutrition to the baby. We were told to prepare for the possibility of an early birth and that our goal was to get as close to 37 weeks as we possibly could.

We almost made it.

A day before we hit 35 weeks, our ultrasound showed that the baby had not grown the expected amount in the previous two weeks and that the fluid levels in the uterus had fallen.  I confess to not being particularly surprised by this news; I had been aware that I was not getting bigger in that aggressive third-trimester way.  The doctor who reviewed the ultrasound told us that we had reached the expected point and that our baby was better off getting nutrition outside the womb than inside it.

I was admitted at 9am on Monday morning and the induction process was begun shortly after noon.

WH stayed with me for the afternoon and evening on Monday and then went home to sleep as we knew that the induction process was likely to be long.  Monday night was very trying... I was not having any contractions, but I was cramping and was too uncomfortable to sleep for longer than an hour at a time.  I spent most of the time staring at the clock and rocking back and forth to try to alleviate pressure.  And trying not to cry.

Tuesday morning brought the very first signs that our baby may not tolerate labour.  Very small drops in heart rate, from which the baby immediately recovered, led to a need to test the baby's ability to withstand contractions.  I was given very small doses of oxytocin and we watched to see how the baby would react.  The baby passed and full oxytocin was begun.

Labour began to come on fairly strongly in the afternoon on Tuesday and my water broke shortly thereafter.  WH and the Maternal Unit took turns rubbing my back and legs as the contractions came and went.  Occasionally, I added to the drama by throwing up.   Still, the little heart rate went down and up again, down and up again.  We watched and held our breath.

I had an epidural in the evening on Tuesday and WH and I managed to sleep.

Early in the morning on Wednesday, the resident came and checked my progress.  Frustratingly... disappointingly... only a centimeter and a half.  Down and up again...  We were given the option of continuing with labour and monitoring the baby for another two or three hours or progressing to a c-section.  Given the issues with the baby's heart-rate and my increasing exhaustion, we chose to go straight to the surgery.  It was time.

but joy cometh in the morning

I was wheeled to the operating room at about 5:30am on Wednesday morning. We were delayed a short amount of time while another emergency c-section took place, so WH and I finalized our choices for names and asked each other about 50 times if each other was ok. "You ok?"  "Yup. You?" "Yup."

I felt very calm heading into surgery, but overwhelmed that we were about to find out whether we were parents to a boy or a girl.  As that moment came closer and closer, I became increasingly emotional.  I had been quite dozy as we waited for surgery, but the surgery itself brought intense clarity of consciousness and focus.

"We're getting close!" "We're almost there!" "Come on, little one!"

And then, at 6:30am on Wednesday, March 14, our little girl was born.  Our. Little. Girl. Four pounds, one ounce of perfection.

Two months to go!

I'm not sure when the "home stretch" of pregnancy techinically begins, but it feels like we're getting close.

When I consider how I look and how much stronger the baby feels everyday, I think that this must be the home stretch.  But when I think about the fact that the baby only weighs about half of what it will weigh when it's born, I think, "Nope... no home stretch here."

When I look at the increasingly large number of baby things arriving on our doorstep, it sure feels like the home stretch. But when I think about how much more there is to acquire and decide, I hope and pray that the middle stretch is here for a bit longer.

You know how it goes, I'm sure.

I'm pretty sure...

... that what I'll be giving birth to in a couple of months is not a baby at all, but a rolling pin.

Attachment

I can't wear my wedding ring any more.

I was fairly certain that this day would arrive sooner than later and I turned out to be right.  I can still wear the engagement ring, but even it is not long for my left hand, I fear.

It's not a big deal and I know that it's temporary, but I was much more sad about it than I thought I would be.

I love my rings.  I look at them every day and think about my husband and my marriage and our home and our life together.  They're a constant corner-of-my-eye reminder of how lucky I am to have what I have.

I know that they are just "things," and that in the grand scheme of things, they don't matter.  I know that if we had no material symbols of our marriage at all, we would still be happy and committed to each other.  I know all these things.

But I miss my ring.

But then, eventually, I feel a might boot to the side of my abdomen and I'm reminded why it is that the rings will be in a box on my dresser and not on my hand.

And that's a pretty nifty thing.

Catching up, catching up

Well, my dear friends, aside from being a negligent blogger, life continues on apace!

We are now almost 28 weeks pregnant, so just at the beginning of our third trimester. I feel bigger every day, and every time that I think that this baby can't get any stronger, he/she delivers a kick stronger than any I've felt before. 

I have absolutely loved being pregnant.

Relative to many, I think that I have had a pretty easy pregnancy.  Some morning sickness that extended almost all of the way through my second trimester, but nothing too bad or too disruptive to every day life. I've been lucky  to have had no medical complications (knock on wood) thus far. My doctor is confident that the pregnancy and the birth will be straightforward and low risk.  I have grown and gained weight at pretty standard rates and the little one has done all the things he/she is expected to approximately when he/she was expected to do them.

So we have had lots of time to simply enjoy the experience, for which I am immensely grateful.  I try to spend some time every day just watching my stomach move or feeling the kicks and punches and rolls without doing anything else.  Just taking that time is part of a general intent in my life to uncomplicate and slow down before the baby comes. 

Slowing down seems to have resulted in more time for things like cooking, planning the nursery, shopping and reading, all of which I'm enjoying.

I wouldn't go as far as to say that life isn't busy, but it's a very fun and interesting kind of busy!

Hope to blog more in the near future about it!

Friday Five! Scattered...

Revkjarla at the Rev Gals gives us a scattered Friday Five today!  

1. What is something you are chronically looking for, if anything?

There are two things that WH and I seem to have difficulty keeping in one agreed-upon location are our cheque book and our passports.  They seem to migrate from one place to another and are never exactly where we need them to be when we need them to be there!

2. What movie are you looking forward to watching sometime in the future?

Sometime in the future I would really like to sit down and watch the first two Godfather movies. Never seen them!

3. What is one of your favorite comfort foods? (me, pizza. hands down).

Easy! Chips and dip.

4. Story time. Tell us a story of one your favorite people that has touched, blessed your life.

Oh gosh... there are way too many people to think of just one! 
5. What do you do to focus or calm or center yourself? (please, I need ideas!!!)

I'm a big fan of deeeeeeeeeeeep breaths. 

BONUS: Share the first thing (or second thing) that comes to your mind after your read this!

It's time for the first second snack of the day!

Turning the Page

Hello blogospere! Nice to see you again!

GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT??

We are having a BAAAAAAAAABBBBBBBYYYYYYYYYYY!

Sorry, I tried to think of a soft and gentle and clever way to make that announcement but nothing seemed to quite encapsulate how I feel about it the way that capital letters do. 

We had the best summer vacation ever and the very best part about it was our discovery about mid-August that we're expecting our first little one.  We are now about 13 weeks along and everything seems to be going well.  I have had a little bit of nausea in the first months, but nothing really to complain about. I'm hopeful that those issues will soon be over! Bring on the 2nd trimester, I say!

It's very exciting and my heart is totally and entirely full at the thought of all the people who already love our little lima bean and can't wait to meet him or her.  I feel very, very blessed! And very, very thankful!

Stay tuned!