Oh CNN...

From CNN, my comments in blue.

(CNN) -- British model and television personality Katie Price, also known as Jordan, and her singer husband, Peter Andre, are to separate, according to a statement released Monday.

Quite honestly, I have never heard of either of these people. I stumbled on this article by accident, and found enough bizarre things in it to want to share.

Peter Andre and Katie Price, who ran the London Marathon last month, are separating.

Question: Does the fact that Katie Price ran the London Marathon last month have anything to do with the separation? I mean, if the sentence read, "Peter and Katie, who cheats on her husband regularly, are separating," I would understand the subordinate clause, but otherwise...

The couple have been married for four-and-a-half years and found romance on the reality show "I'm A Celebrity... Get me Out of Here!, " which was filmed in the Australian jungle.

I'm sorry, they met where? I don't even know what to say. Read that sentence aloud to yourself and try not to laugh at the Australian jungle part. I dare you.

The statement said: "Peter Andre and Katie Price are separating after four-and-a-half years of marriage," the British Press Association reported.

"They have both requested that the media respect their families' privacy at this difficult time."

Only last month the couple, whose reality TV show of their life features on British television, said they were trying for another child.

Ok, I'm sorry, but these people have been on both a Survivor-esque reality show AND a reality show about their lives, and NOW THEY'RE ASKING THE MEDIA TO "RESPECT" THEIR PRIVACY?? Good luck with that.

They have two children together, son Junior, three, and one-year-old daughter Princess Tiáamii.

I'm not sure what's weirder: their daughter's name, or the fact that her brother is simply named "Junior."

Price has a six-year-old son Harvey, by footballer Dwight Yorke, who is disabled.

Who's disabled, Harvey or Dwight Yorke?

And, "These are my children, Harvey, Junior and Princess Tiaamii?

Price first made her name as an English page 3 girl, but has since gone on to become a television star, author and clothes designer. She also competes in show jumping events and has her own stable of horses.

So we have: Model, Television Personality, Marathon Runner, English page 3 girl (I don't know what this is), Television STAR, Author, Clothes Designer, Show Jumper and Stable Owner. Naturally.

Andre, an Australian, came to prominence in 1996 with his international hit "Mysterious Girl."

If this was, indeed, an "international hit," it skipped Canada.